Friday 09th May 2008 - The best darn birthday I have ever had...

I was awoken by the screech of my alarm at 6am.  I opened my right eye slammed it shut and then did the same thing with the left.  Fark!  I’m 38 today!  I lay in bed for ½ an hour contemplating my day ahead.

6am

I work with a lovely bunch of people and they all love to celebrate birthdays.  I’m just a Birthday Grinch when it comes to birthdays.  I personally do not find anything exciting about celebrating ones birthday.  I just can’t be bothered with the whole thing. But keep reading as today ending up being just bloody brilliant.

 I received a ton of phone calls from friends and family wishing me a happy birthday and I find it so hard to be “YAY its my birthday” but I was polite and thankful and tried to act like I was happy to hear from them.

Again, FARK IM 38 today!  Where the fuck have the last 10 years gone?  I almost feel like its been blink and I’m here to today.  I have had a good 38 years filled with amazing highs and lowest of lows but there’s nothing special about that as we all have had the highs and the lows.

Do I feel 38?  There are days where I feel like I am 25 and since losing the weight that I have this past year I feel fitter and healthier than I did at 25 but maturity wise I think my head is still at 25.  Then there are days when I feel every muscle and joint ache and atrophy starting to kick in.

I drove to work muttering under my breath “please no one make a fuss at work, please no one wish me a happy birthday, please, please, please” 

I walked in with a hot cup of coffee in my hand and this is what was awaiting me at work, handy work done by Miss A.  It was very sweet and I was appreciative but I just wanted to start my work, work hard and go home. 

BdayWishes

Alas, things did not go to plan and I had call after call and sms after sms and a ton of emails.  The first phone cal I got was from one of my ex’s AJ.  He had me on the phone for an hour as he too (just like Jase a week or so ago) had his assed dumped by his girlfriend I sat listening to him and I felt sorry for him but then I turned on him.  Boy was that such a great feeling. 

I told him that Karma had bitten him in the arse and after ALL he had put me through it was now doing the same thing back to him, I then added that what did he expect from a 20 year old female (and he is 40) and with that I hung on him.  Happy Birthday Reney this is going to be the best day (okay second best as my BEST day in my life was meeting Henry Rollins) of my life.  I loved the taste of revenge on my tongue and my juices were just flowing.  Yay for Reney!!!

BossMan and Mrs BossMan bought in a cake to celebrate my birthday and I was really touched.  I had a tiny piece as I didn’t want to embarrass them for going to so much trouble and thank God it was cheesecake, as I can’t digest cake whatsoever. 

Then the most amazing thing happened to me.  At 4.54pm I checked my email and see this:

Irene, happy birthday

Henry Rollins

First I was gob smacked and then I thought Suez is messing with my head.  Without looking at the email address I replied back at 4.57pm

Suez, Are you fucking with me?

At 5.05pm I get this email:

Maam, your friend asked me to wish you a happy birthday and so I did. Hope you had a nice day and I've gotta go. Thanks. Henry

I ring Suez and demand to know what she has done as this smells just like her.  She tells me that she emailed Henry Rollins asking whether he could email me a happy birthday.  I by this stage was about to die!  Henry emails me and I am a rude smart arsed cow.  What the fuck have I done?  How do I respond to this email? How do I get out of this huge hole I’ve dug myself into.  Ohhh the shame! Ohhh the embarrassment and Ohhh Reney you’ve done it again!

So at 5.14pm I responded with:

Thanks very much Henry!

Irene

Now this is why I love Henry Rollins so much, because at 8.07pm Henry emails once again with:

Irene, you are ever so welcome. Take care. Henry

I started jumping up and down in sheer excitement and his emails were the best birthday presents I have ever received in my entire life.  I feel truly blessed to have such an amazing friend in Suez.  How cool of Henry.  No deadest, how bloody cool to take time out of his busy life to email just some dumb fan.

I drove to my parents to pick up Elvis and where I was received with loads of hugs and kisses from my Ma & Ba.  They always shower me with hugs and kisses for my birthday and to be honest I think that’s all I really want from them.  I had given my Ma strict instructions that if she was to buy me a present it had to be a naked Henry Rollins with a huge black ribbon wrapped around his neck and a black helium balloon attached to his cock.  I wanted that or nothing at all.  Did I get what I wanted?  Nope!  But I got emails!!!

In all seriousness I don’t quite understand why we get presents for birthdays.  Its not like I did anything special in fact it’s quite the opposite, I tore my mother in two and you want to reward me for that? 

If I had the choice I would ask, no I would demand that my friends and family donate money to my favourite charities.  Now that would be awesome. Now that would show me that you care.

With that I best try and rest as its now 2am and I have to be at Prahran Market by 6am!

Reney