Reney’s blog

It’s been another full on day and as of this very second all I can say is thank God that my birthday celebrations are over with.  I don’t think I could handle another day of festivities.  Yeah, yeah Reney the Birthday Grinch. 

I had the lovely pleasure of having breakfast with my friend Paula today and it was so good catching up with her.  I had an incident though which was rather embarrassing but at least I can see the humour in it.

We met up at The Fringe in St Kilda (my favourite place for breakfast) and drank my 4 shot latte only to have to run to the toilet to throw up.  My band has been feeling so tight since last night.  I stood up and did a dry heave, with that I clamped my hand around my mouth and just bolted.  Did I make it to the loo?  Hows NO for the answer?  I pushed the toilet door open and sprayed the toilet door, tiles and my white top.  Fucking great!

I had to clean it all up, which was rather embarrassing as I refused to let the waiter do it.  In the process of cleaning my spew up and watching Paula from the corner of my eye wiping tears away as she was pissing herself laughing I got the giggles due to embarrassment and just could not control myself.

The waiter watched me clean up and due to wearing a very low cut top I ended up with his telephone number!  Noice stuff Reney.  You throw a spew, wear tight low cut tops and pick up a waiter at the same time.  Maybe this should be how I get men’s attention from now on? 

Paula is now convinced that I am pregnant (as she doesn’t know about my lap band and I have chosen not to tell her yet) and no matter how much I have tried to convince her otherwise she aint listening!  Oh well, if she wants to believe I am pregnant then so be it.  Maybe, being the prankster pest that I am I just make her believe that I am indeed up the duff.

Waiter boy then brought out my breakfast and the second I smelt my egg I had to run for the loo again and release the remainder of coffee that I had in my system.  Readers, I can assure you that I am not pregnant.  I’m just feeling really tight in the band area.

After breakfast with Paula I came home and crashed on the sofa and had a kip to recharge my batteries, which was a godsend.

Later in the afternoon I caught up with Vie for more coffee (but thankfully no spew) and now I am in my little haven battling hard to keep my eyelids open.  Yay I think sleep is finally visiting.

Hope you had a great weekend and thanks again to all for my birthday wishes!

Reney

P.S - Happy Mothers Day to all!

Tonight I had the Bitch Crew over for Mezzes & Tapas Night and I was so excited to have the girls over and we had a blast.  My Bitch Crew consists of 4 of us but due to unforseen circumstances 1 out of the 4 were unable to make it. Happily it was just Maree, Vicki J and myself and holy mother of God did we laugh!  At one point all I could hear was my voice screaming from laughter.  And before you ask, we had no alcohol or any herbal cigarettes for that matter (I don’t do shit like that – tried it but it wasn’t for me)

We sat around my lounge room spread out on all the sofas and literally laughed our little hearts out.  I over did it with the food thing again as there was way too much food and being that the three of us have been banded we hardly eat.  Why do we do that?  Why do we have to over do it with preparing so much food?  It’s beyond ridiculous.

Whilst I was clearing up I was really tempted to ask the Bitch Crew if they wanted to come with me for a little drive, so I could hand the food over to some homeless kids but I was not and still am not sure how the crew would have felt about it.  Mothers Day is tomorrow so I guess I will invite Ma & Ba over for Mezzas and Tapas or better yet just call AJ who will scoff it all down.  

Anyway’s back to the Bitch Crew…I was observing the girls tonight and as “girlie” as this sounds I realised that tonight was almost like a Sex & The City episode.  Maree without a doubt would have to be Carrie (Maree is shoe obsessed and was wearing these MAD boots tonight), Vicki J without a doubt has to be Charlotte (sensible and wise and down right honest) and fortunately or unfortunately I am the Samantha the slutty smutty one.  Way to go Reney! 

Reality is that I like spending time with these girls as they are smart, intelligent, strong women who challenge me and they have something to say with substance.  God love you two!  Because if he doesn’t love you, rest assured I love youse!

I seriously cannot wait to catch up again and have my brain stimulated with intelligent conversation. 

I love my Bitch Crew!

Reney

P.S – Did you notice that I didn’t mention Henry Rollins name once?  (hee hee)

Thank you to all who left me messages regarding this dreadful drug called Stilnox.  After more research and hearing your opinions (thanks to all who emailed me as well) I have decided that I do not want to go down the pharmaceutical path nor do I want to be doing some strange and trippy things.  I do them just fine without being medicated thank you very much.

I have decided to just ride this insomnia ride like I always have and hopefully I will one day just fall asleep or at least get a good 6-7 hours of uninterrupted sleep.  Or better yet I will sleep when I’m dead. 

Just wanted to say thanks to all for your advice and suggestions, and remember just say no to Stilnox!

Peace Out!

Reney

I work with two young-uns who bicker like young girls do, who expect me to mother them and who have a lot of attitude and they can annoy the fuck out of me but deep down when you strip away the bullshit and what I refer to as their “shop front” they are good kids.  As much as their bullshit annoys the life out of me I feel rather protective of them at the same time.

Having said that we have a “professional” that works with us who is in her early 20’s and she too is lovely young girl but there’s something about her that is strange, confusing and weird.  I usually like weird but this is a different type of weird.  I guess that there is something about her that I cant quite put my finger on.  I will refer to her as Specimen 123. 

Specimen 123 like I mentioned is a lovely girl but is just so boring and dreary.  I have never met a young person who is so flat line, so stale, so boring, and so monotonous.  You look at her and there is no life behind her eyes, there is no fire burning within her.  Her voice is this nasally monotone drone that has me seriously wanting to stab my eardrum with a pencil repetitively.

Specimen 123 walked into work today and the second I heard her I felt my intestines twist.  Every time I have seen her she does nothing but complain about something in that drone. But that’s all she does.  She only complains. Today was no different and at one point she started whining so I excused myself whilst she was mid-sentence and I literally walked out of the building, as I just needed some air.   I knew that if I didn’t walk away I was going to scream at her.

Now I know I come across as a loud obnoxious smart arse and yes I am that, but if you were to strip my “shop front” down I am very courteous and I believe that I have good manners.  I always try to be nice even when I am telling someone off but with Specimen 123 she exasperates and bores me to point of no return and leaves me wanting to scream:  “Why won’t you just fuck off!!!”

I can converse with anyone; I do it all day long. I will chat with patients with people on the phone with my work colleagues.  If I’m out and about I will find someone to talk to.   But in this case, Specimen 123, I have absolutely nothing to say to her.  The girl is that boring.  I know I sometimes tend to intimidate people and I can come across as rather aggressive and I thought that Specimen 123 was just intimidated by me, as I am her boss but today proved me otherwise.

Miss A walks out of the surgery today and sits down next to me in angst.  Seems she can’t handle Specimen 123 at all. Which was a blessing for me as I thought it was just me that felt this way.

I sometimes sit back and watch Specimen 123 and really observe her.  (Yeah it’s a bad thing I do, but I like to sit back and watch people and see how the interact) It saddens me that a girl in her young 20’s is not out there enjoying life and doing wild and wacky things.  Experiencing life.

I want to grab her and shake her and tell her to go out, let her hair down and enjoy her life.  I’m not talking about going out getting drunk and having a random shag. I mean having some innocent, harmless fun.   

An example of what it’s like trying to get down to her level and trying to relate and communicate with her:

R: So what did you do on the weekend Specimen 123?

S123: I stayed home with mum and dad.

R: So Specimen 123 read any good books lately?

S123: No I don’t read much

R: So Specimen 123, been out dancing lately?

S123: No I don’t dance much

R: So Specimen 123 been to any good movies lately? 

S123: No not really

R: So Specimen 123 whatcha been listening to lately? Any cool music? 

S123: Umm no not really

R: So Specimen 123, do you like going shopping with your girlfriends? 

S123: Sometimes

Do you get the jist of our interaction?  I have tried all angles, all approaches and come up with a huge cold pile of nothing.   So deadpan, so boring.  It confuses me as I watch our young-uns Miss A and Miss D who have so much electric energy pulsating through them that you can actually feel it and then I compare Specimen 123 who is the total opposite.  I guess I feed off peoples emotions which is a good thing and a bad thing but this girl gives me (and the rest of my work colleagues by the sounds of things) nothing.

When I was her age I was full of life, full of fun and full of adventure and I guess at the end of the day just because I was like that I maybe expect everyone around me to be like that.

This is going to sound rather crass but I have to say it.  I don’t think she has ever been touched down there before (and that’s not a bad thing, each to his own) but its like nothing in life has ever excited her and nothing seems to excite her in the here and now.

Maybe she just doesn’t like me.  Maybe that’s the real problem.  Maybe I am just a fruitcake in her eyes.  Maybe I am just too uber-bitch for her.

Reney

Suez and I were working hard on front reception today, each one of us in our mind zones and working like machines. When all of a sudden I hear this pathetic cacky love song start blaring from the teli.  I looked up shivered in utter disgust and asked Suez in an aggressive sort of way as to whom and what the fuck was this shit?  Suez tells me that it was someone by the name of Brian McFadden.  Okay stop! Before I go any further I have to say how disappointed I was that Suez knew who this piece of bum fluff was and then states that she actually liked the song. 

Can you just imagine my gasp? I was so discontent that Suez likes this repetitive boring manufactured song and after all the time and effort I have put into slowly showing her a darker side to life what does she go and do on me?  She lets me down by stating that she likes this bum fluff. Girl! I know you read my blog I am disgusted in you, shame, shame, shame my friend!

I digress, Suez tells me that this puck, dickhead, motherfucker talent less twit aka Brian McFadden is the twat who is dating Delta Goodrem and then she adds that she has instructed her husband to play this song as her background music at her funeral.  I sat there dumbfounded and speechless for point 5 of a second and suggested that being the melodramatic Greek-Australian that I am, would it not be a better idea if I just threw myself on her coffin and howled when she dies rather than have this “music” (I use “ “, as PERSONALLY I don’t consider this as music.  Music to be needs to be organic and not manufactured – and where the fuck is the guitar riff? the thumping bass and the thrash of the drums?)  Her response?  Umm…NO, I’m being burnt! I had no come back.  I was speechless once again.

I told Suez I didn’t like this “song” (yes “ “ again as I don’t really consider this a song) and I was feeling nauseous and could feel my gag reflex starting to constrict.  Have people not heard of classic love songs such as:

* I wanna be your boyfriend – The Ramones

* This hearts on fire – Wolf Parade

* Fuck her gently – Tenacious D (I love you Jack Black)

* Throw your arms around me – Hunters & Collectors

It was such a cheese-fest listening to this dick!  People actually buy this shit?

Which made me think.  I wonder if Puck here, would still be singing this “song” once he and Delta split up?    Maybe I am just an overtly cynical cow when it comes to lurve and romance? Hmmm maybe?  It’s a possibility. Well okay, lets not kid ourselves here. I AM.

I get that we all have different tastes in music but this was just utter shite! Just would be nice I guess if the music industry could produce real music by real artists.

At least my lesson today was that I need to work harder on Suez as she seems to be one step over on the darker side and the other step on the fluffy side. No sitting on the fence, we cannot have that.   In my world things are black or white. Am I being a tad harsh?  Well yes siree I am but that’s the reality in MY world.     I need to throw her more cd’s, more books, and I need to rant and rave and run my mouth off on the hour every hour and maybe use a cattle prod on her when she slips and goes back to liking shite.  

Reney

I’m feeling flat, I’m feeling ill, I’m feeling gutted, I’m feeling blah!

BossMan tried to talk conspiracy theories with me today and as much as I usually like to throw shit into the mix and run my mouth today saw me really withdrawing from everyone around me.  

When I am in my “moods” I always allow myself 24 hours to fester in my mood and then it has to leave me.  Alas, the accidental yet weird way I found out about Pete’s death has thrown me and my mood and sadness just doesn’t want to go away.

I have been sitting here in utter silence and thinking about the all good times we had and remembering happy Pete & happy Angry. At least I can say that every time I think about Pete I remember him smiling and his high pitched laugh and how much he adored my friend Angry.  I can only hope that Angry is OK,  as OK as any widow can be.  I just need to find her.  

In circumstances such as these this is when I think the Privacy Act & The Freedom of Information Act is a crock of fucking shit.  I have tried every avenue possible and I am unable to find my friend.  I wont give up!

I understand that death is unavoidable and its something that we usually have no control over and one day we are all going to die and I am cool with death.  When I say cool I mean I am ok with it.  I aint ready to die quite yet (funny that just a few years back I was more than ready for it) but anyways…I don’t want to be bringing everyone down!

Tomorrow is another day and hopefully a much better entry from me.

Reney

I was and still am so gutted about finding out about Pete’s death that I decided to stay home and try and find Angry. 

Sadly all my investigating has got me nowhere and I am still to find her.  Perseverance is the key I guess so I will keep on trying to hunt her down.

I can’t shake the fact that I literally stumbled and tripped on Pete’s grave and the way I found it and found out about his passing has made me feel ill.

I’m out!

Reney